Let’s go back a few years. 2009. Almost nine years now! It was the time I finished high school here in Switzerland and was released into the corporate world. I started my apprenticeship in a metal trading company and immediately experienced the curse of sitting all day long.
The past three years I had to ride my bike to high school every day. Four times a day for about 15 to 20 minute each. I trained karate twice a week and was an active girl. Afterwards, I took the bus and train to work/business school and sat all day long. I stopped training karate due to problems in school and also because I didn’t want to go there anymore.
I gained weight. I weighed about 66-69kg / 152lbs being 1.69m / 5.5′. It was a perfect weight considering the BMI rules. But in 2011 it got worse. I had a fellow classmate who was thin and could eat everything. Everything I ate would get a comment from her or a disgusted look. It was also the time I got my first smartphone and rejoined Facebook and Instagram.
I signed up for my first diet app in 2012. I was 69kg / 152 lbs and thought I had to lose weight. I saw all these perfect women out there on social media, and I felt bad for even taking a bite from my chocolate croissant. I was eating bad food while scrolling through someone’s perfect Instagram feed. Pinterest was my new source of healthy recipes, I followed healthy food blogs and wanted to have a body like the women I followed online.
The diet app was about counting calories, and I was still living at home at that time. I tried my best to weigh everything and just count the calories. I see so much pain in my then 19-year-old self now. I wanted to fit in so badly. I had terrible experiences from my high school years. I got bullied and felt like there is a new beginning in my apprenticeship.
But I also learnt that food can be a friend too. I ate when I was stressed. I ate when I was bored. I ate when I got hurt. I ate all the freaking time. I gained weight and am now on my max weight of 88kg / 194lbs. Why am I sharing these numbers publicly? Because as a woman we get body shamed all the time.
We are not good enough, fit enough, XYZ enough.
Believe me, I have “made” it too. I am no less worthy just because I am heavier or I am not the perfect cover model. I am working on my health. I know that I need to prioritise my health. I am back training karate, practise yoga regularly and am looking after myself.
It is very sad that we get photoshopped versions of actors, celebrities and almost every person we see in a magazine. I want to show you the real me! In my work, in my writing and just the way you experience me online.
My coaching series also focus on people like you, who want to make a difference in their life but feel stuck in this whole corporate world thing. I know what it feels like working all day long and always eating on the side. Trust me when I tell you that I skipped a lot of gym sessions after work, just because I was tired.
As your coach, I set goals with you and am your biggest cheerleader. The diet industry destroyed my body image, but I realised the culprit and am now taking inspired action to change it!
We are going to continue living in 2019. Do not be hard on yourself. We are all on this journey together. If you’d like me to be a part of it, read more here.